✨The Decision of Having Kids👶🏻👧🏻🧒🏻✨

Hello Everyone, I hope you don't mind with the forum, and disclaimer, This forum is free from judgment, every answer is the right of each individual, my goal is only as a material for self-reflection for me and anyone who sees this forum. Here are some questions I'd like to ask you 20 Question (or more) about family and children.

(If you already a parent, imagine this question coming when you are not yet a parent)

1. Do you think you are a family oriented person?

2. Do you feel comfortable around family or when a kid approach you?

3. What makes you decide to have a child?

4. What makes the idea of having a family feel right (or not right) for you?

5. Do you feel like you're choosing this, or just going with what’s expected?

6. What kind of life do you imagine if you didn’t have kids?

7. What does “family” mean to you?

8. Would you raise a child the way you were raised, or would you do it differently?

9. If your life changed completely because of a kid, would you be okay with that? Why?

10. What would make you feel like your life is meaningful, with or without children?

11. How do you picture yourself as a parent?

12. If no one ever asked or expected anything from you, would you still want a family?

13. Are you doing this for you, for a partner, or because that’s what people do?

14. Do you feel excited about being a parent, or just afraid of missing out?

15. if one day you finally get married, Do you want a kid at that time, or "someday”? what's your reason?

16. What scares you the most about raising a kid?

17. Can you be okay with a kid growing up totally different from what you'd imagined?

18. What kind of home, vibe, environment would you want & choose to raise a child in?

19. Are there parts of yourself you’d want to heal before becoming a parent?

20. What qualities of a partner do you think you would want to have in raising children together?

21. Do you have any questions that you would like to ask?

Hope these questions doesn't offend any party, if does, i apologizes. Enjoy! 💗

i hope you don't mind with the tag, if so, please let me know in DM and i'll remove it 😊✨

@Fleurke @Yue_ @Sabri_KC @Mulanyyy @LandRoverDiscovery2 @DK4U @psysarah15 @Etienne @Alliatysia @H_E_A_R_T @CCvW @Pennarossa2024 @-Kiki- @diogenes_cask @Colin_Der_Backfisch @PinkiePie

Hello Everyone, I hope you don't mind with the forum, and disclaimer, This forum is free from judgment, every answer is the right of each individual, my goal is only as a material for self-reflection for me and anyone who sees this forum. Here are some questions I'd like to ask you 20 Question (or more) about family and children.

(If you already a parent, imagine this question coming when you are not yet a parent)

1. Do you think you are a family oriented person?

2. Do you feel comfortable around family or when a kid approach you?

3. What makes you decide to have a child?

4. What makes the idea of having a family feel right (or not right) for you?

5. Do you feel like you're choosing this, or just going with what’s expected?

6. What kind of life do you imagine if you didn’t have kids?

7. What does “family” mean to you?

8. Would you raise a child the way you were raised, or would you do it differently?

9. If your life changed completely because of a kid, would you be okay with that? Why?

10. What would make you feel like your life is meaningful, with or without children?

11. How do you picture yourself as a parent?

12. If no one ever asked or expected anything from you, would you still want a family?

13. Are you doing this for you, for a partner, or because that’s what people do?

14. Do you feel excited about being a parent, or just afraid of missing out?

15. if one day you finally get married, Do you want a kid at that time, or "someday”? what's your reason?

16. What scares you the most about raising a kid?

17. Can you be okay with a kid growing up totally different from what you'd imagined?

18. What kind of home, vibe, environment would you want & choose to raise a child in?

19. Are there parts of yourself you’d want to heal before becoming a parent?

20. What qualities of a partner do you think you would want to have in raising children together?

21. Do you have any questions that you would like to ask?

Hope these questions doesn't offend any party, if does, i apologizes. Enjoy! 💗

i hope you don't mind with the tag, if so, please let me know in DM and i'll remove it 😊✨

@Fleurke @Yue_ @Sabri_KC @Esma-Nur @Ursul_Romanesc @DK4U @psysarah15 @Etienne @Alliatysia @H_E_A_R_T @CCvW @Pennarossa2024 @-Kiki- @diogenes_cask @Colin_Germany @PinkiePie

1 yes

2 yes, ig

3 because i like kids

4 idk, i just think having wife and kids, just my own familly, is nice

5 im choosing it

6 i have to think ab that 🤔

7 exactly what a familly is

8 the way im raised

9 i think im ok with it, bc he/she is my beloved child

10 with

11 i hope a goid one 😂

12 yes

13 for me

14 excited

15 someday, i think first having time with only your partner is nice

16 nothing yet 😉

17 depends on what way

18 farm/country house probably

19 no idea

20 i hope my wife wants to do homeschooling too

21 i guess not 🤗

Thankyou @LandRoverDiscovery2 for your answer! 🤗✨

. Do you think you are a family oriented person? 100procent

2. Do you feel comfortable around family or when a kid approach you? yes

3. What makes you decide to have a child? very little i started to think about having children i want them to show them the love i never recived

4. What makes the idea of having a family feel right (or not right) for you?

very right

5. Do you feel like you're choosing this, or just going with what’s expected? choosing this

6. What kind of life do you imagine if you didn’t have kids? traveling our working on a cruiseship

7. What does “family” mean to you? my little family is enoufg

8. Would you raise a child the way you were raised, or would you do it differently? complety different omg yeeees

9. If your life changed completely because of a kid, would you be okay with that? Why?yes of course because when you becoming a parent you can not just think about yourself .. you have now the children to look after and raicin them

10. What would make you feel like your life is meaningful, with or without children?with children

11. How do you picture yourself as a parent? a good parent somebody also strict

12. If no one ever asked or expected anything from you, would you still want a family?of course

13. Are you doing this for you, for a partner, or because that’s what people do?I do it for meself

14. Do you feel excited about being a parent, or just afraid of missing out?excited

15. if one day you finally get married, Do you want a kid at that time, or "someday”? what's your reason?better not to quick first lnow your partner better

16. What scares you the most about raising a kid? the responsability

17. Can you be okay with a kid growing up totally different from what you'd imagined?yes

18. What kind of home, vibe, environment would you want & choose to raise a child in?safe place full of love and communication

19. Are there parts of yourself you’d want to heal before becoming a parent?yes

20. What qualities of a partner do you think you would want to have in raising children together?a listener ,a good hearting men ,a communicator ,a worker ,a helper

21. Do you have any questions that you would like to ask no just say nice forum niece

Hiii @mayuuram!! 😊😊 It is really nice that you made a forum again!!! 😛 And it is a nice topic bc it is important!!! 🌸👶🍼🥰

So these are my answers:

1. Do you think you are a family oriented person?

Yes!! I think family is the most important there is. And if you make a family yourself than you should give everything for the family you make and of course also for your parents and other family!!! 🥰❤️❤️❤️

2. Do you feel comfortable around family or when a kid approach you?

Yes with family that live here in The Netherlands. But also in China we have family in Nanjing and i feel comfortable even if my grandmom does now not really recognise me bc she has dementia but i can take care of her when we are there and try to help her. Bc she helped me and others like 10000 times so now we can help her.

3. What makes you decide to have a child?

I think that if i have a partner than you decide together and that he also approves that. And that you are ready to give the baby everything the baby needs!!! Like time and that you can get things and love and care!!!! 😊😊🤗🤗🤗

4. What makes the idea of having a family feel right (or not right) for you?

Maybe in my case if i dont have room that the baby has a safe house and that we can get things for the baby that the baby needs. For example i know that in my country now a lot of people stay living home longer than the wanted. And they wait to make a new family bc they cant buy or rent a home. That is really a big problem of it. I am not sure if now it gets a bit better bc i am in the house of my parents but for example if you study and get your diploma and start working than a lot of people could not get anything because there were not enough homes at all or WAYYYYYYY too expensive.

5. Do you feel like you're choosing this, or just going with what’s expected?

I think both bc i really want to have TWO babies. Bc i dont have a brother or sister and i think that is MUCH nicer for the baby if they have a brother or sister later and are not alone. And about the babies i think my parents expect it but i also really want it. BUTTTT only when i am ready and for example now it is impossible but if i finish university i think maybe work 3 years so you started in a good way and then you get a baby. That is the nicest i think if i can choose it.

6. What kind of life do you imagine if you didn’t have kids?

If i cant get children or my partner does not approve it i think that i will give everything i can for my parents and my partner and other family and friends. But i would also be painful that i cant get children i think until i die.

7. What does “family” mean to you?

Everything. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

8. Would you raise a child the way you were raised, or would you do it differently?

We live in The Netherlands but my parents are super Chinese in way that they raise me and that you have to follow rules. And a lot of times my friends dont understand it and make comments about it. But i think i would not be so strictly like my dad is bc he can be really strict for example about the grades in school bc it is never good enough and what is allowed for other things. And i think maybe if i can choose it than i think less strictly is maybe good.

9. If your life changed completely because of a kid, would you be okay with that? Why?

Yes because if you have a baby or maybe two than you must first give everything for them. So if that means it changes completely that is ok bc if they need it than you should do that or you cant give enough care and love if for example you dont have time at all.

10. What would make you feel like your life is meaningful, with or without children?

If you can give everything from yourself for your partner and parents and if you have children also the most for them. My mom and also my grandmom said that the most important is that you give more than that you get bc that is what is expected and what you should do. So you should give what you can and that is important. And it also makes you feel good if you can do that.

11. How do you picture yourself as a parent?

Maybe first like a big panda if you have a baby in your belly. That would be super weird but that time i dont mind being fat bc the baby needs it. But after it i think hugging the baby the whole day and taking care of my baby until you really have to do other things.

12. If no one ever asked or expected anything from you, would you still want a family?

Yes. If i can make a family and i have a partner and he agrees it than i think that is important.

13. Are you doing this for you, for a partner, or because that’s what people do?

Do you mean getting a baby? I think for all because if you make a family also with a baby or with two babies and you can take really good care and you can give everything than it becomes positive. And if your family is super safe and with love and care than it can also bring positive to others who are close to the family you make like friends or others. Because if you do good and for example if you smile that already can make another person a bit happier that moment. So if you do that with the whole family you make it is even more!!

14. Do you feel excited about being a parent, or just afraid of missing out?

I would the most feel afraid if i do it good enough or that i make mistakes as parent later.

15. if one day you finally get married, Do you want a kid at that time, or "someday”? what's your reason?

In my family the tradition is that you first get married if your partner approves it too. And that first you must make a really good and nice family and home so the baby comes in a super loving and caring place and is really safe.

16. What scares you the most about raising a kid?

If maybe i make mistakes and it is my fault if something goes wrong.

17. Can you be okay with a kid growing up totally different from what you'd imagined?

Yes because the most important thing is that he or she is safe and knows that there is for him or her love and care ALWAYS. And if that is good than i try to help that they can do good in school and do the things THEY like. For example sports or music or other things THEY like and not what i choose. And for school i try to help them if they for example have questions or if i can do anything. And i hope they will do good with grades BUTTTTT i will not give so much pressure and that it is super stressy like is for me sometimes now. I want to do that differently. But i think with a lot than my children can decide a lot of things what they want bc it is my life and i dont want to be selfish. And i can try to help and give for them what i can for what they choose.

18. What kind of home, vibe, environment would you want & choose to raise a child in?

That they feel love and care the most. So if they want to say anything than they can do that. From secrets and funny things and stories and anything. So they can say what they want. And that they can play without for example being afraid that somebody yells if they make too much noise. And i want to help that they learn things like for example cooking if i can do that better and other things. So maybe also tasks like i get but not so many!!! 😛 😛 But that they learn things too.

19. Are there parts of yourself you’d want to heal before becoming a parent?

Maybe be more confident and that if for example you need to do something for your children that it is not super stressy for yourself and that you cant do it or that you dont do things good enough. So maybe stronger and more confident and also maybe bigger if you get pregnant bc if i get a baby now i think it is dangerous but if you are bigger than the baby is more healthy and i dont want a baby that has problems and is super small bc i am not good enough yet. So the baby must be healthy and that is the most important. More than for example how i want to look or things like that.

20. What qualities of a partner do you think you would want to have in raising children together?

The most that everything is safe and there is love. So for example that he does not yell at them or punishes them or me. It is important that everybody feels super safe and loved and everybody tries to help each other and care for each other A LOTTTT!!!!!!

21. Do you have any questions that you would like to ask?

How many children do you want to have? And do you want the most a boy or a girl or both? And what kind of names do you like for the baby?

I hope that you like my answers @mayuuram and if you have questions or anybody else you can just ask it always!! 🌸🌼🌻 And what are your answers @mayuuram!!! 😛 😛 ✨❤️

I tag some other people than you already mentioned above who maybe also like this forum but i hope ANYBODY answers the questions who likes it!! 🙂 @Simone724, @Idkbro, @GermanPotato-Nikalia, @Parsaa, @Miss_Penpal, @Annika2007, @Piwipete, @TomiL, @AgDel, @Emmiiii_17_11, @Chantal-, @buffyfan90, @frozenpizza001, @TheLOVERofMachines, @Traveler_John, @martutuni, @Ilexforest, @Txya, @BartL, @Billa, @Paolo17jun, @Savi2024, @Wildflower-Farm, @NILU1234, @Lianshen, @Jullian

Hello Everyone, I hope you don't mind with the forum, and disclaimer, This forum is free from judgment, every answer is the right of each individual, my goal is only as a material for self-reflection for me and anyone who sees this forum. Here are some questions I'd like to ask you 20 Question (or more) about family and children.

(If you already a parent, imagine this question coming when you are not yet a parent)

1. Do you think you are a family oriented person?

2. Do you feel comfortable around family or when a kid approach you?

3. What makes you decide to have a child?

4. What makes the idea of having a family feel right (or not right) for you?

5. Do you feel like you're choosing this, or just going with what’s expected?

6. What kind of life do you imagine if you didn’t have kids?

7. What does “family” mean to you?

8. Would you raise a child the way you were raised, or would you do it differently?

9. If your life changed completely because of a kid, would you be okay with that? Why?

10. What would make you feel like your life is meaningful, with or without children?

11. How do you picture yourself as a parent?

12. If no one ever asked or expected anything from you, would you still want a family?

13. Are you doing this for you, for a partner, or because that’s what people do?

14. Do you feel excited about being a parent, or just afraid of missing out?

15. if one day you finally get married, Do you want a kid at that time, or "someday”? what's your reason?

16. What scares you the most about raising a kid?

17. Can you be okay with a kid growing up totally different from what you'd imagined?

18. What kind of home, vibe, environment would you want & choose to raise a child in?

19. Are there parts of yourself you’d want to heal before becoming a parent?

20. What qualities of a partner do you think you would want to have in raising children together?

21. Do you have any questions that you would like to ask?

Hope these questions doesn't offend any party, if does, i apologizes. Enjoy! 💗

i hope you don't mind with the tag, if so, please let me know in DM and i'll remove it 😊✨

@Fleurke @Yue_ @Sabri_KC @Mulanyyy @Ursul_Romanesc @DK4U @psysarah15 @Etienne @Alliatysia @H_E_A_R_T @CCvW @Pennarossa2024 @-Kiki- @diogenes_cask @Colin_Germany @PinkiePie

1) honestly? No. I think i’m good with friends and my partner but i don’t feel myself with my relatives

2) i don’t feel comfortable about my relatives and often my parents also,when a kid approaches me I obviously act kind and nice even if i’m not,never was and never will be a fan of kids

3) i think that love makes you want to have kids. It’s banal to say but it’s the main reason

4) sometimes i want to have a kid but most of the times i absolutely don’t. I want to get married but i don’t think i want to have kids. And if i will have one,only one. I think I’d probably feel trapped if i had a kid and i also don’t want to suffer. There are many things that worry me about having a kid.

5) yes! I’m choosing it. I NEVER let other people choose for myself

6) if i won’t have kids and i probably won’t,i want to always live my best life,my best career and have fun

7)i think that when a family is healthy,they are people that are always there for you no matter what

8 ) i’d do it differently in many ways. my parents made a lot of mistakes

9) no I don’t think it would. Because there would be too many negative things

10) being successful and happy about myself

11) i wouldn’t be strict at all and very understanding

12) yes (family for me could be me and my future husband)

13) i’m doing it for me

14) afraid of too many things

15) I don’t care if i have a kid before we get married or after

16) if he dies,if he is born disabled,if he is born with serious illness,if he becomes a rapist or a killer…and i could continue till tomorrow

17) yes i can. He has to be himself not me. I don’t expect him to be a copy of me like some toxic parents expect

18) calm,healthy environment where he can be himself

19) oh many things trust me

20) he needs to have my exact opinion about some things

1) honestly? No. I think i’m good with friends and my partner but i don’t feel myself with my relatives

2) i don’t feel comfortable about my relatives and often my parents also,when a kid approaches me I obviously act kind and nice even if i’m not,never was and never will be a fan of kids

3) i think that love makes you want to have kids. It’s banal to say but it’s the main reason

4) sometimes i want to have a kid but most of the times i absolutely don’t. I want to get married but i don’t think i want to have kids. And if i will have one,only one. I think I’d probably feel trapped if i had a kid and i also don’t want to suffer. There are many things that worry me about having a kid.

5) yes! I’m choosing it. I NEVER let other people choose for myself

6) if i won’t have kids and i probably won’t,i want to always live my best life,my best career and have fun

7)i think that when a family is healthy,they are people that are always there for you no matter what

8 ) i’d do it differently in many ways. my parents made a lot of mistakes

9) no I don’t think it would. Because there would be too many negative things

10) being successful and happy about myself

11) i’d be not strict at all and very understanding

12) yes (family for me could be me and my future husband)

13) i’m doing it for me

14) afraid of too many things

15) I don’t care if i have a kid before we get married or after

16) if he dies,if he is born disabled,if he is born with serious illness,if he becomes a rapist or a killer…and i could continue till tomorrow

17) yes i can. He has to be himself not me. I don’t expect him to be a copy of me like some toxic parents expect

18) calm,healthy environment where he can be himself

19) oh many things trust me

20) he needs to have my exact opinion about some things

You give super honest answers Rose!!!! BUTTTT i think that you would be a great mom bc you can be really caring A LOTTTT for your friends and that you help them even if you get nothing for it. So maybe you are a MUCHH better mom than you think it. 😊😊 One thing i was curious of: do your parents want that you are like them almost the same? I ask it bc you said it but i dont know if you mean that. 🙏🙏❤️

You give super honest answers Rose!!!! BUTTTT i think that you would be a great mom bc you can be really caring A LOTTTT for your friends and that you help them even if you get nothing for it. So maybe you are a MUCHH better mom than you think it. 😊😊 One thing i was curious of: do your parents want that you are like them almost the same? I ask it bc you said it but i dont know if you mean that. 🙏🙏❤️

Hi! No my parents are not like that,i can be how i want to be,but i have a friend that needs to be exactly like her parents and I understand how it can destroy someone’s life. Thank you!💕💕💕💕💕

Hi! No my parents are not like that,i can be how i want to be,but i have a friend that needs to be exactly like her parents and I understand how it can destroy someone’s life. Thank you!💕💕💕💕💕

Oh yes 🙄

Thát can totally destroy someones life! People should be as they want to be!

Desicions nót made by others!

1) No, not really, I do like my family but I’m not THAT family-oriented at all. Family things, such as meetings and stuff are irrelevant to me.

2) Around my family… yes, I do, but I’m not into kids at all, hence I’d feel uncomfortable if that happened (it actually happened a few times).

3) I don’t intend to have a kid in the future, but that’d be an independent choice. If that was the sort of life I wanted… I’d go for it, but it’s not the case.

4) Maybe people do that in order not to remain alone someday?

5) I’m choosing this for myself, I wouldn’t leave it randomly as it’s actually a serious thing.

6) My current life, a life with no kids, it’s certainly a different life from many other people’s, but that’s still a way of living.

7) My family? Everything.

8) I’m not 100% sure about that. There may be some aspects I would change as we live in different times than two decades ago. However, I wouldn’t change everything, just a few things here and there.

9) No, I wouldn’t. And I wouldn’t let that happen anyway due to the aforementioned reasons. Not being into kids is more than enough not to let your life change because of that.

10) Your life depends on you, on the decisions you make, may them be rightfully or not. An empty life is not the best solution, regardless of having children or not.

11) I would be too strict on some aspects as well as paradoxically way too permissive under other circumstances.

12) I don’t let other people’s thoughts condition my life, so no.

13) Whatever I do, I do it for myself. I honestly have no respect toward whoever does something just because many people did that first.

14) It’s irrelevant to me.

15) If that ever happened, I would marry someone with my same exact intentions towards the future, otherwise we’d end up arguing and eventually taking different “paths”. That’d certainly occur sooner or later.

16) I have no idea about that. Probably committing mistakes in general.

17) I’d have to accept that eventually, may I like it or not. He’d grow up and become every year more independent.

18) Luxury is not mandatory, as long as your financial situation lets you and your hypothetical kid live with dignity, that’s more than enough. A genuine environmental where they could be surrounded by other kids, activities, and so on.

19) I’d have to be a completely different Mattia ahah

20) The right principles and dignity, politeness and respect towards each other as well as THE others. Open mindedness as well as we no longer live in the 20s.

21) No, thank you.

@mayuuram this morning i go to try out as babysitter for new family!! 😛 😛 I know is not an answer for the question but maybe it is also nice to say. But this time it is different bc it is not a baby but TWO children and they are a bit older. So i dont know if it is maybe nice to say that news here too!! 🙂

Well auntie @Fleurke, i knew you are a great mother! and yes you are like a sun as a leo shine other zodiac, and anyway do you have any advice, or message like one or two toward a young adult who would building family? what things that must be do and don't to have a longlast relationship to your children?

oh wow, honestly @Yue_, i always like whenever you answer the question in the forum like you don't just answer, you also seem to draw the reader into your own imagination with each paragraph you write. So, do you often visit your family in China? And what family traditions in your family (in Netherland and Nanjing) do you remember and love most?

For me (my) pets are my kids

I never was fond of human kids

hhhh it's okkk i often see my cat as my baby hhh so what's you like the most about your pets? @Ilexforest

lmao yea, i agree @Idkbro some of parent are toxic, like they obsess to explicitly control they child. While when i talked to psychologist (while i were researched my thesis), the psychologist said that we can't control someone like a dictator. But, a parent need to guide, to answer, to explain, to mentor, to accompany the child in every phase. and from 0-6 the cognitive function of the kids starting to process while they are observing, explore, imitating people around them, and the curiosity of them growing along with their increasing age, and teenage phase is the phase that a child become veeeery curious about this and that, and they are also at a stage where they can fight or defend their rights, that's why it's not control that would be answer for teenage issue, but accompany, understanding, love, affection, answer so that both parent and kids can be closed, like a bestfriend. Limitating, restricting not helping anything, but only make the child exploration unfinished, which would endup make the kids having crisis identity later or make the kids having trust issue with their own family, while family is the first place for every child to come home and feel loved and protected. And since you have such a high curiosity about this and that, i'm sure you'll make a great mom later

Thankyou for your answer, @Call_me_mattia. I respect your thoughtful and independent perspective on family and parenthood, it makes me curious, what personal values or experiences shaped these views the most for you?

anw i'm sorry that if I can only respond today because yesterday I just had a date with my bf and usually I rarely check social media hhhh

@mayuuram You're most welcome, but I didn't fully understood your question, what do you mean exactly?

No problem for your late response, by the way 🙂

hhh, well the question referring to what core beliefs or life experiences influenced the way you see things now. Like is there any meaningful event, or a specific lesson that you learned, shape how you feel or think?

Oh, no, not at all. I wasn’t into such thoughts when I was a teenager and I thought that would change. However, it didn’t happen, I think the same as in the past.

Obviously I’m not into the typical life everybody - or almost - has starting from their 20s or 30s, which includes kids and stuff.

I would still love to find someone who shares my same opinion about it 🙂

1. Do you think you are a family oriented person?

Definitely not when I was a teenager, now it's a totally different story!

2. Do you feel comfortable around family or when a kid approach you?

I've changed a lot since I was younger and now I get along with my family and kids, also!

3. What makes you decide to have a child?

Wanting to raise a good human being, sharing the experience with your loved one

4. What makes the idea of having a family feel right (or not right) for you?

When I was younger I was scared about having the "adult responsibilities"

5. Do you feel like you're choosing this, or just going with what’s expected?

It should be a personal choise, I don't usually feel pressured by society, it's quite the opposite!

6. What kind of life do you imagine if you didn’t have kids?

Just one word: empty

7. What does “family” mean to you?

Someone you can share good and bad moments with

8. Would you raise a child the way you were raised, or would you do it differently?

Differently

9. If your life changed completely because of a kid, would you be okay with that? Why?

Of course life changes with a kid, but that doesn't mean you should stop doing things you enjoy as many people do

10. What would make you feel like your life is meaningful, with or without children?

With

11. How do you picture yourself as a parent?

Open minded, laid back, a counselor, someone who my child can count on

12. If no one ever asked or expected anything from you, would you still want a family?

Of couse, yes

13. Are you doing this for you, for a partner, or because that’s what people do?

It should be a shared decision between me and my partner

14. Do you feel excited about being a parent, or just afraid of missing out?

Excited!

15. if one day you finally get married, Do you want a kid at that time, or "someday”? what's your reason?

Kids come at every stage of life, married, engaged, single... Kids need love, not a contract between two adults!

16. What scares you the most about raising a kid?

Messing up

17. Can you be okay with a kid growing up totally different from what you'd imagined?

The key is to let them grow and follow their path along with them!

18. What kind of home, vibe, environment would you want & choose to raise a child in?

Ideally with other family members in the countryside

19. Are there parts of yourself you’d want to heal before becoming a parent?

Go to therapy, people! With or without kids! Do yourself a favour! 🙂

20. What qualities of a partner do you think you would want to have in raising children together?

Openminded, that respect and treat women equally, and when we don't agree on something, we discuss about it without yelling at eachother

21. Do you have any questions that you would like to ask?

Yes, @Call_me_mattia your answer nr. 4 is what perople usually say but I think it's unfair for people to have a child so that they can have someone to look after them when they're old! Parents should let their kids live their life without expecting to turn them into carers!

Oh, no, not at all. I wasn’t into such thoughts when I was a teenager and I thought that would change. However, it didn’t happen, I think the same as in the past.

Obviously I’m not into the typical life everybody - or almost - has starting from their 20s or 30s, which includes kids and stuff.

I would still love to find someone who shares my same opinion about it 🙂

yess, that's okayy, everybody has right to decide their own life plan, as a human indeed have freewill and i hope the best for you!

1. Do you think you are a family oriented person?

Definitely not when I was a teenager, now it's a totally different story!

2. Do you feel comfortable around family or when a kid approach you?

I've changed a lot since I was younger and now I get along with my family and kids, also!

3. What makes you decide to have a child?

Wanting to raise a good human being, sharing the experience with your loved one

4. What makes the idea of having a family feel right (or not right) for you?

When I was younger I was scared about having the "adult responsibilities"

5. Do you feel like you're choosing this, or just going with what’s expected?

It should be a personal choise, I don't usually feel pressured by society, it's quite the opposite!

6. What kind of life do you imagine if you didn’t have kids?

Just one word: empty

7. What does “family” mean to you?

Someone you can share good and bad moments with

8. Would you raise a child the way you were raised, or would you do it differently?

Differently

9. If your life changed completely because of a kid, would you be okay with that? Why?

Of course life changes with a kid, but that doesn't mean you should stop doing things you enjoy as many people do

10. What would make you feel like your life is meaningful, with or without children?

With

11. How do you picture yourself as a parent?

Open minded, laid back, a counselor, someone who my child can count on

12. If no one ever asked or expected anything from you, would you still want a family?

Of couse, yes

13. Are you doing this for you, for a partner, or because that’s what people do?

It should be a shared decision between me and my partner

14. Do you feel excited about being a parent, or just afraid of missing out?

Excited!

15. if one day you finally get married, Do you want a kid at that time, or "someday”? what's your reason?

Kids come at every stage of life, married, engaged, single... Kids need love, not a contract between two adults!

16. What scares you the most about raising a kid?

Messing up

17. Can you be okay with a kid growing up totally different from what you'd imagined?

The key is to let them grow and follow their path along with them!

18. What kind of home, vibe, environment would you want & choose to raise a child in?

Ideally with other family members in the countryside

19. Are there parts of yourself you’d want to heal before becoming a parent?

Go to therapy, people! With or without kids! Do yourself a favour! 🙂

20. What qualities of a partner do you think you would want to have in raising children together?

Openminded, that respect and treat women equally, and when we don't agree on something, we discuss about it without yelling at eachother

21. Do you have any questions that you would like to ask?

Yes, @Call_me_mattia your answer nr. 4 is what perople usually say but I think it's unfair for people to have a child so that they can have someone to look after them when they're old! Parents should let their kids live their life without expecting to turn them into carers!

awwwwwww somehow i can feel the proud in yourself when i read your answer @Chantal- i can see that you already did your best to be the best mother for your kids.

I have questions especially for you, what are the struggles you often experience when raising your children? How do you handle if your child makes a mistake? And what approach do you usually do to stay close to your children?

I'm glad my pride radiates through my phone 🤣 Honestly I wouldn't use the word "struggle" because it's been a wonderful journey so far. I don't believe punishment is a good way to educate a kid so we talk through it, trying to understand why he did something and explaining to him why I think it's wrong. I do all sort of things with my kid, we play videogames, have a walk in the woods, play board games and most importantly we don't take ourselves too seriously! I'm not the average parent stressed about the kids 😬 I enjoy it too much!