🥰🖼️ Interview with Mayuuram 🌺❤️

u can choose

then i'm tiana, i love her character 😋

then i'm tiana, i love her character 😋

then i'm tiana, i love her character 😋

That is a VERY nice choice i think!!!! 🙂

Btw I ❤️❤️ the third part of your interview that we just posted above!! ⬆️⬆️ You really took the time to give very nice answers and share what you think and i like that A LOTTTT!!!! 🥰🥰🏆🏆

Sorry I could not say more yesterday about answer 11 @mayuuram but in my family it is also normal that my dad is the boss in our house the most. It is a bit what you say in the interview BUTTTT he only says for example what will happen if he thinks that is the best. And he is always very kind and thinks about the family the first always. But there are also some respect rules for example if he talks i dont interrupt him. And you just wait until it is your turn to speak and you can say what you want. And he is also very protective always and tries his best for the family. So i dont think that is abusive like what you describe about what happens sometimes in Indonesia. That is different i think. And in our family for example education is VERY important so that you can do later what you want and find a good job. It is not like what you described that sometimes happens that girls get less education because they are less important. That is not the case at all in our family. 🙂 I was thinking a lot about what you said in the interview so i wanted to post this comment about it. 😊😊🤗🤗🤗

Sorry I could not say more yesterday about answer 11 @mayuuram but in my family it is also normal that my dad is the boss in our house the most. It is a bit what you say in the interview BUTTTT he only says for example what will happen if he thinks that is the best. And he is always very kind and thinks about the family the first always. But there are also some respect rules for example if he talks i dont interrupt him. And you just wait until it is your turn to speak and you can say what you want. And he is also very protective always and tries his best for the family. So i dont think that is abusive like what you describe about what happens sometimes in Indonesia. That is different i think. And in our family for example education is VERY important so that you can do later what you want and find a good job. It is not like what you described that sometimes happens that girls get less education because they are less important. That is not the case at all in our family. 🙂 I was thinking a lot about what you said in the interview so i wanted to post this comment about it. 😊😊🤗🤗🤗

Do you know @Yue_ ? in this world there are so many parenting styles, it's exist due to the diversity of human characters.
and for parenting styles that are often exchanged or considered the same are assertive (Authoritative) parenting styles with dictators (Authoritarian) one.

although both party place parents as the highest authority, both try to have some rules and punishment, but the difference lies in whether the child is given an explanation or reason as to why their parents give them punishment? or the attitude shown by parents after the conflict, is it getting distant & colder or not?
if there are some evaluation pra-conflict, then their parent more into assertive one. but if not, then, their parent use dictator parenting style. and from what you had described, your dad more into the assertive one than dictator 😋

the dictator parent have tendency to don't want to explain, cause some of them actually have no common sense, the reason or basis for why they treat their children like that. more into They feel that children must obey whatever they are told to do. And they have tendency to use verbal abuse (shouting, gaslighting etc)/physical abuse (hard pinching, hit their child, throw things at their child, etc) as their punishment.

And in fact, psychologists do not approve of dictatorial parental behavior, cause their actions have more negative impacts on children than positive ones. their dictatorship & 'overparent' tend to make their children lose self-confidence, and have difficulty expressing themselves. and will end up like a dog who always waiting for their owner's command, they have difficulty knowing themselves.

Thank you very much for your answer @mayuuram and i like a lot what you write!! I am happy that in my family it is not like the dictator what you write like for example shouting or physical abuse or anything like that at all. If people would shout to me i always freeze like an ice cube and dont know what to do very well. But my parents are not like that at all. Also my dad is not like that. He is very kind but if he says something you have to do that really!!! But that is not a problem and he only says that if he thinks that is appropriate or that it is good for me or the family. So he does not abuse that at all.

But he does sometimes find difficult to say some things and it would be VERY strange like cuddle a lot or saying things because he has different way about that. So for example when i got hurt with a bike accident some time ago he does not hug a lot but he went to a shop and bought two boxes of strawberries because he knows i like that a lot. And that is his way to give you support and that he loves you. 🥰🥰 But my mom and aunt are very different about that and they give hugs or say things more directly in a nice way. And i like both ways. I hope that is the same for you!!! 🌈❤️🌈

Thank you very much for your answer @mayuuram and i like a lot what you write!! I am happy that in my family it is not like the dictator what you write like for example shouting or physical abuse or anything like that at all. If people would shout to me i always freeze like an ice cube and dont know what to do very well. But my parents are not like that at all. Also my dad is not like that. He is very kind but if he says something you have to do that really!!! But that is not a problem and he only says that if he thinks that is appropriate or that it is good for me or the family. So he does not abuse that at all.

But he does sometimes find difficult to say some things and it would be VERY strange like cuddle a lot or saying things because he has different way about that. So for example when i got hurt with a bike accident some time ago he does not hug a lot but he went to a shop and bought two boxes of strawberries because he knows i like that a lot. And that is his way to give you support and that he loves you. 🥰🥰 But my mom and aunt are very different about that and they give hugs or say things more directly in a nice way. And i like both ways. I hope that is the same for you!!! 🌈❤️🌈

oh yes, every parent has it way to show their love, there is no perfect parent, sometimes they make mistake too, cause being a parent are never been easy, especially it's their first time, It's as if they are still trying to find out what parenting style suits their child.
but if it bother you or you wanna know something, you can take initiate first. but first talk to your mom to back up you haha

⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ PART IV

16: What is your biggest dream for the future?

My biggest dreams are having a small harmonious and warm family with me and my partner as a cool parent. both of us working from home so our kid never feel lonely or feel the loss of parental role.

17: If you would live in a different time and in a different place, what would you choose and why?

Living in different time and place eh? well i already feel elated & embrace my current life haha so i choose to stay.

18: If you marry in the future with somebody, how does that work in Indonesia? Can you choose that or the parents and is there a special Indonesian wedding dress in white or a different colour?

You ask such a nice question. usually, Indonesian wedding, like the decoration, theme, outfit, etc chosen by mutual agreement between the bride and groom and the family. but again it comes back to the condition of the family. If the family contributes more to the wedding capital than the bride and groom, usually they seem to have the power to determine the decoration, theme and outfit. Especially if the parents have an annoying nature and often control. However, if the parents are wise, usually everything is left entirely to the bride and groom. However, usually to respect the family, two concepts are usually used, one traditional concept and one modern concept. Let's say, my boyfriend's family is Minang, more or less my wedding will be grand like this https://pin.it/5ErGFrRMG 

19: Do you want children in the future and if yes how many? What is the most important lesson that you want to teach your children?

Hmmmm children. maybe maximum 2. because having a child in my opinion requires a lot of time, capital, and energy. especially when educating children, each phase of a child's life has a different way and approach. like when they are babies - toddlers, let's say the child still doesn't fully understand every sentence and teaching that we give, so at that stage it is the parents who are trying harder to understand and to maintain attitude. because the age phase of 0-3 is a phase where the child imitates adults more about what humans should be like, including speaking style, behavior, etc. and then, the older the child, the more assertive the parents should be, but still show that their parents' attitude is because they love their child and want him to be the best person. That is why, according to psychologists, assertive parenting style is a parenting style that has a very positive impact on the child.

and if i have children, it's simple, i just want to teach them how to be human. because there are still many people who don't act like humans, still practice the law of the jungle, bullying, harassing people, committing sexual violence, etc. would a normal human being with self-control act like that? no..

20: You wrote a very nice forum about the line!! I will add the link here: https://penpal-gate.net/forum/13-anything-and-everything/9978-the-line ! Will you write new forums in the future? And can we ask more questions in the future in this forum or make a new part in this interview when we think of new questions? 😛

Actually i still don't know, but it's possible 🤣 and yes, you can ask me anything and anytime, My door is wide open for you and for anyone who wants to ask, feel free!

Thank you very much @mayuuram for the interview so far!!!! But i hope that all the interviews in the forum will get new parts because i think that would be very interesting!! 😃

I think we need to update the interview because you made a lot of other nice forums after the interview like for example:

➡️ The adult life forum

➡️ The Kingdom of PPG (i made it but it was @mayuuram's idea)

➡️ Fictional Celebrity crush

What kind of new forums do you like to make @mayuuram? 😊😊 I am super curious! 😛 And maybe it is a nice idea @Etienne if you can see of a member on his or her profile the latest forums they made? But if that is super complicated you can of course ignore this suggestion! 😛

Actually, every forum I create is spontaneous, I don't have a plan about what I want to do later 🤣

Actually, every forum I create is spontaneous, I don't have a plan about what I want to do later 🤣

Hahah ok!!! 😛 😛 I hope that you have that super often in the future too! 😊😊😇😇😇

This interview is beautiful (as are the others I've read)

I'm speaking here because I like the topic of education.

I think there are potentially many problems in education, but one related to dictatorial education is normal parental limitations. (What does "normal" mean?)

Unfortunately, those who end up screaming often do so because they have no other tools, but it is serious if they do so because the missing "tool" is love.

Personally, the focus of education is simply "being". Always be a positive person, and in this everyone is an educator, not just parents.

The concept of "normal" is inherently subjective and influenced by personal experiences, cultural background, and societal norms. What feels completely ordinary to us may be perceived differently by others—including our own children or experts in a given answers.

This is why open and thoughtful communication is essential in addressing any issue. Through dialogue, we can bridge different perspectives, find common ground, and establish shared understandings that work for everyone involved. Effective communication fosters mutual respect and helps navigate differences in a way that is constructive rather than confrontational or endless fight/debate

anw thankyou for visiting @Giorgio_Siciliano it's all @Yue_ efforts to create such an interview, thanks to her 😊✨

Sorry, I am going to go back a ways, I hope that is alright.... I am American. I am from the liberal hub to end all liberal hubs, Boston, on the North East Coast. You say that liberal Americans, surprise you, and you don't know quite what to make of them.... Are they really that open? Then you check the things they say with other Americans. Interesting method there. A lot over here, depends on what part of the country you are from. When you ask if we are really that open... I am just curious about the issues you are discussing with them and where they are from? Please don't take my questions as judgement. I am just seeking a better understanding. On what issues is your culture different from liberal americanism?

Sorry, I am going to go back a ways, I hope that is alright.... I am American. I am from the liberal hub to end all liberal hubs, Boston, on the North East Coast. You say that liberal Americans, surprise you, and you don't know quite what to make of them.... Are they really that open? Then you check the things they say with other Americans. Interesting method there. A lot over here, depends on what part of the country you are from. When you ask if we are really that open... I am just curious about the issues you are discussing with them and where they are from? Please don't take my questions as judgement. I am just seeking a better understanding. On what issues is your culture different from liberal americanism?

ofcourse, in Indonesia, there are still those who adopt to Eastern culture where the majority of its people are very strict with religious law (87% moslem) which also mixed up with patriarchal system and the diverse culture. which i think some of people here got mixed up with this and that (i'm reffering to urban people who move to jakarta). although I feel that as a citizen who live in Jakarta (Indo), the original jakarta people (who is not an urban) itself imo are already open minded, but it turns out there are those who are more open minded. Jakarta itself is the city center of this country, so its industrial movement is very fast.

In this interview, i'm not saying that American is bad of course. liberal here is more about me seeing how an American is given more options and for me with openness of mind people are more open to wider options and with more opportunities/chance/experiences. which not like here (Indo). which I think is why America can advance to become a developed country. They do not have very strict limitations like here (Indonesia), which for some people in Jakarta dream of a life full of options, full of freedom like in America.

and During my time with my friends who are Americans, I saw that there is a side of America that is similar to Jakarta (I mean the citizen similar, both are individualistic, independent, but the difference is only in the number of options/opportunities as I said before) that is why people here (indo), if they feel too tied down by limitations, will run to America.

hope my words in the interview not misinterpreted, if it yes, then i'm sorry

Thank you for the response. I appreciate it. 🙂 No your words were not misinterpreted at all. But I want to say something to you about the USA... The choices we have here or that you think we have here much of it is false. Much of it is based on gender and much of it is largely and practically only available to the extremely wealthy. Being an American woman is not without it's headaches. For example when I hire a contractor I pay a large fortune more. They over charge me because I am a woman. They don't listen to me and do whatever the hell they want. Then my Finnish husband doesn't understand why the project was so expensive and I must explain it is because I am a woman. He doesn't understand, that gender and cost can be linked here. Another great example would be what we call "the pink tax." A thing I refuse to pay on principle. But women are instructed to always be making themselves beautiful with various cosmetics that cost a fortune. Women's shaving cream for legs, costs far more than man's for face. It is the exact same thing and exact same amount. So women pay more. Men don't have to worry about their appearance in the same way. So they have a lot less cost. I would present to you, that cages can take many shapes. The American shape, puts the bars a step away. A little less directly visible. But they are still there at least for women. Much much much less so for men.

Thank you for the response. I appreciate it. 🙂 No your words were not misinterpreted at all. But I want to say something to you about the USA... The choices we have here or that you think we have here much of it is false. Much of it is based on gender and much of it is largely and practically only available to the extremely wealthy. Being an American woman is not without it's headaches. For example when I hire a contractor I pay a large fortune more. They over charge me because I am a woman. They don't listen to me and do whatever the hell they want. Then my Finnish husband doesn't understand why the project was so expensive and I must explain it is because I am a woman. He doesn't understand, that gender and cost can be linked here. Another great example would be what we call "the pink tax." A thing I refuse to pay on principle. But women are instructed to always be making themselves beautiful with various cosmetics that cost a fortune. Women's shaving cream for legs, costs far more than man's for face. It is the exact same thing and exact same amount. So women pay more. Men don't have to worry about their appearance in the same way. So they have a lot less cost. I would present to you, that cages can take many shapes. The American shape, puts the bars a step away. A little less directly visible. But they are still there at least for women. Much much much less so for men.

Thank you so much for sharing this with me. I truly appreciate your openness and the insight into the realities many women face in the U.S., especially the forms of inequality that still persist despite the image of freedom and choice. You're absolutely right, cages can take many shapes, and sometimes the ones we don't immediately see are the hardest to escape. honestly, i know the sad truth about america but i don't mention here cause i'm worry it might hurt or belittle someone else (since in this forum mainly not talking about america, so i don't talk a lot about america), plus i don't know if you are HPS or no, so i try my best not to offends you (since you directly reply me). And yes i agree that the pink tax is like oppressing woman to pay more, even though the products offered are actually the same to the men's version but the different only the color, like razors, pink razors (labeled specifically for women) are more expensive than men's razors. (while actually men razor also use paint to color the razor, blue or black with the same price, they had better quality tho). And about the pink tax itself also occurs here. there are several sides in America that are similar, because again social issues do not only occur locally, but also globally.

And aside from that, US itself always interesting to talk about, in my major, visual communication & design, in here we often discuss about issue that occurs in globally (including america), and I do hope the issue of inequality in America will improve, because a lot of Indonesian citizens (especially women) also support the equality campaign, because living in equality is everyone's right.

Ah ya, anyway which part of America are you from, Mrs?

Let me start by asking what HPS stands for? I am not familiar with this.... Whatever it is.
You would have to try pretty hard to offend me. I am not an easy one to offend. So please don't walk on eggshells.
Honesty, is an important thing. One should never curb their honesty not to offend. Though it might be prudent at times to consider how we speak truth and choose words with care.

I agree. Equality is a right. Here lately, things have been rolling back. They are discussing disenfranchising women who have taken their husband's name from having a right to vote. They have stripped freedom of choice about controlling one's own body from the majority of the country. Next they will be coming for our right to an independent bank account and our right to work outside the home. Women's rights are in terrible jeopardy as is independence for women. I fear soon we will be living in our father's homes until we are purchased for a biblical bag of silver and dragged off by our hair by a caveman to his home. It is really getting bad here for women lately.

I talked about my experience with contractors.... My husband didn't understand it at all. The whole thing shocked him. I asked him to deal with it but he said he was too busy and I told him it would cost 3 times as much if I dealt with it. he asked how that could be I responded I am female and that is how it goes with this industry when you are a woman. He didn't believe it. So, I proved it to him. he was horrified. You should have heard him curse a blue streak in his native language Finnish, when he got the bill. I just said, "see." I will never be dealing with contractors again. There are places in which women are far more equal than they are in this country even when this country is at it's best on this issue. In Scandinavia, there is nearly no pay discrepancy between men and women. Here, women make 30% less with same education doing the same job doing equal work and workload with equal success.

Ahh! YES! You understand perfectly about cages. Especially the ones hardest to escape in which the bars are hard to locate. Exactly.

You can call me Amanda. Mrs. or Ma'am, is my grandma. 🙂

I am from the North East Coast.... New England. I grew up 5 minutes from MIT and Harvard University, in the Boston area of Massachusetts. Today, I live on a small homestead farm in Central MA, between Boston and Worcester, perhaps a bit closer to Worcester, (Worcester is pronounced woos-tur woos oo as in book. tur as in turf) This area is known for it's insane names for stuff. And for stuff being pronounced differently than written. It drives visitors insane. Secretly I am horrible enough that watching them struggle amuses me. I live close to a road called Wattaquatuck. Try saying that 10 times fast.... Originally this region of MA was called Lancaster. Boston back then was called by it's native american name still, Shawmut.