Teacher: which hand you used to write with?
Student: neither, I always use a pencil to write!
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Jokes Everyday life and customs
Oh now I get itIn a French primary school,the teacher asks a student :
"How much is 2+3?"
"I don't know."
"What about 1+3?"
"Idk."
"Well...Then what about 4×20+10+8?"
"Oh I know! It's 98!"I think you'll get it if you know a little French hahaha😂
Quatre-vingt-dix-huit 🤣🤣
a: "I think we should think outside the box and set a Guinness record."
b: "Good idea"
a: "I'm going to cut down a tree, sharpen both ends, and apply for the world's largest toothpick."
b: "Why don't you think of something practical?"
a: "I‘ll dig a hole in the ground, fill it with water, and claim the smallest lake in the world."
b: "I'll just dig three holes in the ground, put three fingers out and apply for the world's largest bowling ball."
I saw my friend the other day , he said that he had met a guy down the road who had a wooden leg called Fred. Ok I said what was his other leg called?
A: Are you sleeping?
B: yes!
A: do you hear me?
B: no!
Do you like Darjeeling, don't know I've never Darjeeled.
I guy walked into a bar. Ouch he said that hurt
How do you know there's an elephant in the fridge ?, Footprints in the butter,
How do you know there's 2 elephants in the fridge ? Sounds of giggling.
How do you know there's 3 elephants in the fridge ? You cant shut the door !
there are a hundred bricks in a plane.one fall out. how many bricks are left? - 99
How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? - open the fridge, put the elephant in close. the refrigerator
what are the four steps to putting a giraffe in the refrigerator? - 1. open the refrigerator 2.take the elephant out 3. put the giraffe in 4.close refrigerator
there was a birthday party for the animal kingdom. who didn't go? - the giraffe that's in the refrigerator
sally had to cross the bridge the bridge was filled with alligators? how'd she crawl safely? - the alligator’s at the party
sally finally crosses the bridge and she dies. what happens? - she got hit by the falling brick
Three men from northern, central and southern Italy on vacation came across a village where cannibals lived. The village chief said to the man from the north: “What a beautiful white skin! With you I can make a beautiful canoe! What is your last wish?” and the man, resigned, replied: “A knife, please”... and took his own life, then the village chief went to the man in the center and asked him the same question and he replied: “Give me a knife, go, let's end it and not I greet you St. Peter!” He too took his own life and finally went to the southern man and again: “What a beautiful white skin! I will do a beautiful canoe with you!” And the man stopped him by replying: “White, damn! Two weeks in Naples and we will look exactly the same!” But the village chief didn't listen so he asked him the fateful question but the man replied: “A fork!” They put it to him and he began to poke holes in himself saying: “Now what the heck are you doing in a canoe!!”
(In Italian it’s better because they use dialect too and different voices)
A pun has not completely matured until it is fully groan...
Barry calls his boss and says, “I’m having trouble with my eyes.”
“What’s wrong with them?” the boss asks.
“I can’t see myself coming into work today,” says Barry.
Barry calls his boss and says, “I’m having trouble with my eyes.”“What’s wrong with them?” the boss asks.
“I can’t see myself coming into work today,” says Barry.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAH this is very good 😂